Y’all, I want to start by saying I know in my heart God is good. I’ve seen His hand through many seasons of my life. Can we acknowledge how hard it is to hold onto that when it seems, to our eyes, that there is a season of nothing in front of us?
My husband and I have recently made the decision, at the Spirit’s prompting, that he was to resign from his position after having been there for three years. We are so incredibly grateful how God orchestrated that job, it truly was an “only God could’ve have done this”, but we heard Him say it was time for more.
September is 100% covered plus some, and half of October has been taken care of, but beyond that, we don’t know what he is doing — or at least it hasn’t been revealed to us yet. I won’t lie, I am laying down fear every day.
Backing up a little bit, I will openly admit that I struggle with feeling anxious over finances. As our pastor puts it, every marriage needs a How and a Wow. J is the Wow and I am the How, no doubts about it. Fast forward to this past March (2023), we started hearing that whisper of “It’s time for more.” It has taken me five months to be at peace with God’s plan in this. We applied to so many different positions for J, most near my family in another state, and some here in Tennessee, but every door and window was closed, except for the ones that were working for ourselves.
Do Not be Dismayed
We recently felt release to share what is going on with his job about a week ago. The outpouring of connections and congratulations was so much more than I anticipated. J got connected with some people outside of our personal area and I am trusting those seeds are going to bloom.
The support that has meant the most to me, that I will keep in my heart, actually comes from someone we don’t know. She commented this verse on a share of my husband’s post on Facebook. Oh how this is what I am clinging to and speaking over our family.
Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.
Isaiah 41:10
Wildflowers
Along those same lines, my verse for the past couple years of my life, that I continually have to speak so that my head and my heart are in agreement, is Luke 12:27-28. (I actually had this verse embroidered by a friend, Thistle & Leaves. She’s amazing.) I don’t read this as an admonishment, rather I can hear Jesus tenderly whispering it.
Look at the lilies and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?
Luke 12:27-28
Can I be honest? I don’t know why my faith shakes when it comes to His provision. We see time and time again how he is a good God who cares for his children. Heck, He’s a king, we are his children, we have access to those heavenly riches should he see fit.
Conclusion?
I am no theologian and this part of our story hasn’t concluded yet (but I needed a way to break up this paragraph from the rest). BUT I do know in my heart that God is good. He loves His children. He cares for us more than we can comprehend. It does NOT mean life is all sunshine, lollipops, and rainbows, but it does mean He’s still there walking with us when it is dark.
Also because I find myself easily moping when I listen to slow songs that are meant to be encouraging, here is the hype song that has been on repeat in my head to get my head and heart in agreement (it’s also in the Spotify playlist linked in the side column):